A love like ours
by Aishite
Summary: If Gina hadn't been revealed as a cylon by the time Pegasus and Galactica met up, would things have been the same? Inspired by You Could Be Happy by redknightalex. Since she never finished her story, I though I'd try to do my version of what would have happened if Cain didn't know about Gina's identity at first. Please review!
1. Cold When Alone

In the darkness of her quarters, Helena could barely make out anything besides the sleeping systems analyst who lay with her arm wrapped tightly around the admiral's waist. Helena couldn't help but smile at the feel of Gina's warm breath on her neck. She placed a small kiss on her lover's nose, shifting to get out of the embrace, though Gina made that more than difficult.

Once out of the excruciatingly warm bunk, Helena found herself a bra and tanks, which Gina had discarded last night during their celebration on finding Galactica and the civilian fleet. She pulled a few reports out from the table and moved over to her desk. Flipping on a light, Cain went over the status of the Pegasus. She sat like that for at least ten minutes or so before hearing Gina stir.

"What time is it?" she yawned, walking over towards the admiral with the sheet dangling over her breasts.

Helena glanced over towards her watch, placing a kiss on Gina's lips before answering. "Three thirty. I'm sorry; I didn't mean to wake you up. Go back to bed."

The blonde shook her head and crawled into the admiral's lap, looking down to see what she was working on. "Only if you come with me," she whispered into Cain's ear. "It's awfully cold when I'm by myself."

"Cold?" Helena snorted, though wrapping her arms around Gina's slim figure, resting her head against her shoulder. "That thing's at least one hundred degrees." She kissed her shoulder blade tenderly.

Gina giggled. "Fine, then I'm staying right here."

"On my lap?" Helena asked, though secretly enjoying her younger lover's position. "It might be difficult for me to get my work done with you sitting here."

"Then maybe," Gina whispered, getting up only to sit back down, this time facing her admiral, "You shouldn't focus on work and instead you should focus on something a little more…interesting."

Helena ran her hands up Gina's spine, causing the younger woman to shiver slightly. She brushed aside a piece of blonde hair in order to place a kiss on her collarbone. "Hmm…? Like what?"

"Oh, I don't know," Gina hummed. Her body rocked slightly against the admiral's advances. "I think that I could use a little attention."

Cain grinned and sucked on her lover's neck, causing Gina to gasp loudly at the sensation. Unfortunately, the time of the day caught up to her, and she fell into Gina, yawning loudly.

"I'm so sorry," Helena gasped. "I'm too tired, I can't do this."

"Don't worry," Gina mumbled, playing with a strand of dark hair. "You did your fair share last night. If anything, you should be on top." She grinned happily as Cain ran her hand up the front of the sheets, stopping once she reached Gina's cheek.

"I'm good, but thank you," Helena sighed, still cupping her cheek. "Are you hungry?" Gina shook her head, though her stomach betrayed her. "I'll order some food." Cain reached up over towards the receiver, dialing the number to the kitchens.

"It'll be here in a little bit," Helena muttered.

Gina moved over towards the desk, letting her feet fall into Helena's lap. The admiral massaged her feet as Gina let out a soft moan. "Are you sure they don't mind?" she asked. "It's really early. Why are they even working at this time?"

"When we picked up the civilians there were a decent amount of people who knew how to cook, so we can have the kitchens open twenty four seven." Helena placed a kiss on Gina's thin ankle.

"Mmm…" Gina muttered. "What time do you have to leave?"

"Six," Helena whispered. A smile crept across her face when she saw Gina flinch at the word. "Don't worry, that's a ways off."

Gina still gave her a slight pout, making Helena scoop her bottom lip up between her own. "What time do you get back from Galactica?" she asked once they broke apart from each other.

"Depends," the admiral growled. "This so called president seems to be taking her position rather seriously. It could take a few hours, but I hope to be back by eight."

"I think that they need something to believe in," Gina sighed. "Something other than 'revenge.' If this woman can give them some hope, then that's great."

Unlike Helena, the systems analyst was always looking at things with optimism, as if there was always some good in everything. That optimism was both annoying and the thing that made Helena love Gina with all of her heart.

"I don't want to think about work right now," Helena groaned.

"Okay…" Gina thought out loud. "Then what do you want to talk about? Or are you awake enough for sex?" she teased.

Helena rolled her eyes and scooted Gina's feet out of her lap, moving to get a small item from one of the drawers. She brought over a long, narrow box, but held it behind her back so it was just out of her lover's sight.

"What's that?" Gina asked. "A present? For me?"

Cain gave her a sly smile. "Close your eyes," she whispered.

After making sure the blonde's eyes were truly closed, Helena took the lid of her box and took out the glittering object. Brushing aside Gina's hair from the back of her neck, Helena draped the silver necklace around her, clasping it in the back.

"Can I open them?" Gina pleaded. Helena answered her with a kiss and muttered a quiet yes. "Oh, Helena, it's beautiful."

Her fingers traced the curve of the small diamond that hung at the bottom of the silver cord. She claimed the other's lips lightly, though still with passion. "Where did you get this?"

"I bought it from one of the civilians we picked up," Helena whispered, pressing her forehead up against Gina's. "Happy anniversary."

Gina's hands darted up to her mouth, some tears welling up in her eyes. "Oh my gods, honey…I'm so sorry. I completely forgot…how could I…?"

"Shh," Helena pressed a finger up against her lips. "It's all right. I barely remembered myself, so don't feel to bad."

"I'm making this up to you," Gina stood up and placed her hands on the admiral's hips. "Dinner, tonight? Promise?"

"As long as I get back by nine, but I can't promise my meeting with Commander Adama and President Roslin won't take too long." Helena sneered slightly at the schoolteacher's name. "If I'm not back by then, I don't want you waiting up."

"Wake me up when you get back?" Gina pouted.

"Never," Helena said, and upon hearing the knock on the hatch, moved over in that direction. "You need your sleep to finish that new software."

Gina growled slightly, but didn't argue, and rather sat down at the 'dinning room' table. She listened to Helena taking the platter from the young cook and close the hatch with what was most likely her foot. The older woman placed the plate down on the table.

"I love you," Gina said, pulling Helena into her lap. "I love you so much."

"I love you too," Helena whispered back.

Please review!


	2. Along for the Ride

Admiral Cain sat patiently on Colonial One, listening to the president and commander argue with her about her dealings with the civilian population she had picked up a few months prior to their encounter.

"I agree," Cain's voice was low and steady. "Some civilians should relocate into the civilian fleet. However, many of them are providing essential services aboard my ship and I cannot afford to allow such a heavy loss in personnel. Even if it means splitting up families." She glared at the other two commanding officers, waiting for their responses.

"Are you sure?" Roslin murmured, lifting her head from her hands. "There are so few actual families left in the fleet. I can't bear to think that we're going to have to split up the ones that still exist."

Gina had made the same point to her several times, but the facts didn't change just because it would be more bearable to keep families together. Specialists had to stay where they would be most useful. Sentiments didn't matter.

"I am sure," Helena growled. She lifted her glass back up to her lips and took another sip of ambrosia. Neither of the people in the room understood how cruel this situation actually was. Those people should be thankful for the fact that they and their families were alive, and even if they couldn't be together, at least they knew that they were unharmed. Thousands of the other remaining members of the human race couldn't say the same thing.

"Is there at least a way we can allow them to keep in touch?" Roslin asked. "Surely they don't have to cut off contact completely." Cain thought for a moment about the possibility of arranging some sort of communication between the people aboard Pegasus and the civilian fleet.

"What do you have in mind, Madame President?" Adama spoke for the first time in several minutes. Helena cringed at the sight of the commander sucking up to this self-proclaimed messiah of humanity. The military should not be bowing down to Roslin's every whim. They were at war, and when at war, the military becomes priority and officers become the leaders. Not school teachers.

Roslin rested her head against her hand. "I don't know," she mumbled. "At the very least, we can allow them to call one another every week, but some face to face contact should be in order at some point."

"We can allow them to converse over the coms," Cain agreed slowly. "But face to face will be difficult, no matter how often." She watched Roslin and Adama nod their heads, and for now, the issue was resolved. The admiral glanced over her shoulder at the clock that hung on the wall. It was only seven o'clock, meaning she might be able to have her dinner with Gina after all.

"I understand," Roslin stated blankly. "Thank you for your time, Admiral Cain. Is there anything else you need to discuss?"

Although she was anxious to go, Helena knew there was at least one more thing she was forgetting. "Ah, yes. Our systems analyst aboard Pegasus is having some difficulty with a software she is developing and is hoping to borrow some technologically savvy personnel for a short while."

"It would be a good way to keep Baltar busy for a while." Adama gave a crooked smile to Roslin, but quickly wiped it off once Cain turned towards him.

"Can you send him over tomorrow morning?" Cain asked coldly.

"Of course, Admiral." Roslin returned the cold tone with her own, along with a thinly smile. "I will make sure he is on a shuttle to Pegasus by ten. Thank you again."

"Thank you, Madame President. Commander." She gave a salute and exited the cabin, walking over towards her raptor.

Once inside, Helena thought about how Commander Adama had shifted awkwardly in his seat while waiting for the meeting to end. To be honest, she understood how he would feel. Being the top dog for the first time in his life, and then having to give it all up to her must be difficult, Cain could assume. However, she was still admiral and he was only a commander.

Gina would no doubt pity him and beg her to be easy on the old man. Throughout their relationship, Gina had always been the sentimental one, making up for Helena's lack thereof.

"One year," she whispered to herself. "One frakking year with her."

_She had walked in wearing a simple black dress, which cut off just above the knees. It had been their first official date, and when Gina had shown up looking so elegant, her legs looking longer than they ever had before. The sight had taken Helena's breath away, and made her knees quiver._  
_"Good evening, Admiral." Gina smiled shyly, tucking a curled piece of honey colored hair behind her ear._

_Helena found the will to speak and dared to move closer to the goddess like woman. "Please, call me Helena. This isn't a meeting about your work."_

_"Helena," Gina repeated the name as if it were made of glass. "That's lovely, Helena."_

_She blushed, which was quite uncharacteristic of the admiral. "Thank you, but I never really liked the name. I was named after my grandmother." Helena pulled a chair out for the young woman to sit in. "White or red?"_

_"Red, please." Gina looked around the cabin. "I think that's lovely." She paused for a moment and just smiled at the admiral._

_"What?" Cain poured her a glass while looking down at her suspiciously._

_"You look beautiful," Gina stated, completely unashamed of her feelings. "I mean truly beautiful."_

_Again, Helena could feel color rushing up to her cheeks. "So…so do you." She mentally scolded herself for loosing control over herself. None of the other women she dated in the past could make her feel this way, but this woman was so different from the rest of them._

_"How long have you been serving in the admiralty?" Gina asked, letting her weight fall upon her forearms on the table._

_"I signed up when I was eighteen," Helena said. "Ever since the first war, I decided that I wanted to keep the people I cared about safe. No matter what the cost was, I wanted to have some control over the future."_

_Gina smiled and raised her glass in a toast. "To the future."_

_"To the future," Cain agreed._

That had been the first date, or, the first one that Helena would count. Their agreement to give whatever was going on between them a chance had occurred a week prior, but they'd never sat down on a one on one until that night. The dinner had been on Pegasus, but Gina hadn't seemed to mind. They continued their relationship onboard Cain's ship up until the attacks. At first, Helena had considered breaking up with Gina in order to focus all of her attention on being admiral, and had explained this to her younger lover. After a week or so, however, she found she had needed the blonde next to her to keep her from falling into that dark place again. Someone needed to be her moral conscious.

And Gina had been more than happy to fill that role. Almost every day, right after Helena was done with work, the systems analyst would be waiting for her in the admiral's quarters. Normally, it was soothing to have her waiting. Other days, Helena would be full of stress or self-pity and need to take it out like she had when she was younger, but found she couldn't due to Gina's interference. Eventually, Helena let her in and Gina pulled her out of that dark place. The razor hadn't been used in months, only the occasional open and close.

"Admiral," her pilot broke her out of her thoughts. "Admiral Cain, we've arrived back on Pegasus.

"Thank you, lieutenant." She stepped off the raptor and walked out of the landing bay towards the officer's cabins. The pain in the right side of her neck was acting up, and she could feel the discomfort creeping down into her shoulders and upper back.

Helena made it to her cabin at last, swinging open the hatch to reveal what looked like an empty room. "Gina," she called, missing her girlfriend after a long day. "Gina, honey, where are you?" She walked over towards the table, thinking that's where she would find Gina. However, all she found was a note written in the system analyst's big, loopy handwriting.

_**Helena,**_  
_**I decided that in order to pay you back for this morning, I had to do something a little more special than just making you dinner. Please go find Lt. Gresha. He will take you to Cloud Nine. Don't worry, I've already talked to Fisk, and we will be back by nine (tomorrow morning). If you love me, you will come.**_  
_**With love, **_  
_**Gina**_

Helena groaned, as she didn't desire to get back on a raptor and have to fly anywhere. However, she needed to make sure Gina was back on Pegasus by nine thirty, and if Gina said Fisk had things under control she could try to relax a bit. Not once had she had a day off since the attacks, so taking a half-day off wouldn't be mean disaster for the fleet.

"You made it!" Gina squealed, running up into Helena's arms. "I was afraid you weren't going to come."

"Well," Helena said, looking around the luxurious room. "I'm not sure if I plan on staying."

"Please, Helena," Gina begged. "Colonel Fisk said he could take control of the CIC while we celebrated. You're taking three hours off. Three! Can I please have three measly hours of your time?"

Helena shrugged casually and made her way over to the table: chicken, rolls, red wine, salad, and corn. It was an actual meal, not just protein bars and weak coffee. She felt her stomach growl and a smile appeared on Gina's face.

"Let's eat," Gina giggled, pulling out a chair.

Cain stared at her for a moment, enjoying the moment thoroughly. Eventually, she settled down into the chair opposite of Gina, letting her shoulders unwind themselves and a smile to creep onto her face. After an hour of talking and eating, the two wound up on the couch. Gina's head rested underneath the admiral's chin.

"Thank you," Helena whispered.

"For what?"

"Everything," Helena sighed. "For this, for everything. We wouldn't be here right now if you weren't here to hold me together."  
"That's not true." Gina snuggled up closer to her, falling perfectly into her curves. "You're the reason we're all here, I just came along for the ride."  
Helena placed a soft kiss on the blonde head, humming slightly. "I mean it. If I didn't have you here with me, I don't want to think about what could have happened."

"You would be a cold hearted bitch who wouldn't have helped all those people and would have declared marshal law in an attempt to get Laura Roslin out of office." Gina helped her out, a grin on her face. "Or something like that."

Helena shoved her off her lap playfully and stood up. She made her way lazily over towards the bed, discarding her uniform as she went. "You coming?" she asked casually.

Again, in order for me to get better, I could really use some help from you guys! Pleasssse leave a review.


	3. Ignorant of the Truth

Okay, I'm pretty much caught up to where the last story left off

(I'd like to apologize to the original author for sort of stealing your story line, but you just can't stop halfway through such a great story. Also, sorry for not being as great of a writer as you were… sigh.)

.

Gina woke up between Helena's breasts, and she nuzzled closer to the warm flesh. A spark of joy filled her chest as she felt Helena inhale slowly, still sleeping. She had made the correct choice to stay with her lover, rather than giving _Pegasus _up to the other cylons. Although she had yet to find the will to tell the admiral about her true self, she knew the day would be coming soon when she would have to explain how, why, and when she had made her final decision.

But not now. Gina wasn't cruel enough to steal her lover's few, precious moments of sleep in order to tell her such a terrible thing. Right now, the woman could just sleep and be ignorant of the complete truth, and it wouldn't hurt anyone. Gina was nervous of the man named Gaius Baltar, who, as Cain had told her last night, was going to be meeting with her in a few hours.

If she remembered correctly, another Six had been assigned to him, and he would therefore recognize her. If she was lucky, he might suffer from memory damage, or the other copy had wiped his memory of her. Unfortunately, the probability of that was exceedingly low. If all else failed, she would come out to Helena about her true self. Or plant a bomb on Baltar's raptor. She wasn't particularly fond of either option.

Helena stirred gently below her, and Gina rolled over onto her side in an attempt to make her more comfortable. She stayed still, hoping that Helena would continue to sleep for at least another fifteen minutes. After coming to the conclusion that Helena would continue to sleep, Gina placed a lazy kiss on her jaw and shifted herself back into the elder woman's side. If it truly were the last time she would be able to lie in bed with Helena, then she would make the most of it.

Gina kissed her admiral's shoulder and muttered a small prayer to God.

Gina sat in the IT room on _Pegasus_, her stomach doing flips.

"Miss Inviere," a marine addressed her. "Vice-president Baltar is here."

She nodded, a small, sad smile appeared on her face. "Thank you, if you could please wait outside during out meeting, I'd be most grateful."

"Of course." He gave her a curt nod, which was more a jolt of the head, and exited the room. Gina placed her head between her palms and waited for Gaius to come in. Perhaps if her head were down the whole time he wouldn't recognize her. After all, she didn't have that platinum blonde shade most of the others did.

The longhaired man walked into the room, and through her fingers, Gina let out a sigh. He looked around the room, oblivious of the IT coordinator until she cleared her throat slightly. He looked over towards her, Baltar's mouth dropping once he saw her face.

"Damn," she muttered. "You recognize me."

"Of course I do!" he shouted. Gina flinched at the volume and pitch of his ending syllable, but shook it off.

"Please be quiet," Gina hissed, looking over him to make sure the marine hadn't heard. "I'll answer your questions, but please, please keep your voice down." She glared at him, waiting for the doctor to nod. "Good. Now, in case you haven't noticed, no one here knows I'm…"

"A cylon," he accused loudly, causing her to hit him hard on the shoulder.

"And I'm sure no one here knows you are a cylon collaborator." Gina gave him a fake smile. "So if you want to keep it that way, you will stay quiet for the time being. Now, who all on Galactica knows about my model?"

He glared just above her shoulder, as if his attention was being drawn elsewhere. "Adama," Baltar said at last. "Thrace, Agathon…. I'd avoid everyone on Galactica if I were you. The civilian population won't know who you are, but military personnel most likely does."

"Frak." She leaned back into her swivel chair.

"Now, if you don't mind, I would like very much to know what you are doing here." Gaius slammed his fist down against the metal table in an attempt to look like he was the one in control, though he backed off once he saw the look on her face.

"I fell in love," Gina murmured, mainly to herself. "And I was willing to give everything up for her."

Gaius jolted awkwardly, and he looked into the woman's blue eyes, searching for the truth. "So…you're really on our side?"

"I," Gina stated defensively, "Am not going to be responsible for the death of the woman I love. Even," she swallowed hard and fought back her tears. "Even if she comes to hate me."

They stayed where they were for a moment in silence. Gaius allowed the cylon to collect herself, trying his best not to be too rude to the woman.

"When did you decide to side with the humans?" he asked her slowly.

Gina scoffed at the word 'side,' but answered him all the same. "Six months after the attack a base ship found _Pegasus_. I… my orders were to send over the override. I couldn't do it."

He nodded his head slowly, choosing to believe her. In his head, the other Six was looking at her sister with pity and disgust. Gaius was choosing to pity her.

"You need to tell the admiral," Baltar mimicked the words of the model in his head. "If someone finds out, then they'll know I helped you, and then the one and only ally you'll have will no longer be able to help you."

"One and only?" she muttered angrily to him, but he cut her off.

"We do not know how the admiral will react to the situation, and neither Commander Adama nor President Roslin are cylon supporters, therefore you will most likely be air locked or tortured. If you tell the admiral the truth, then they may grant you some leeway."

"You mean they won't kill me straight away," Gina concluded, resting her head against her fist. "I can't loose her, Gaius."

"I know," he responded truthfully, thinking back on his days with his own Six and wishing this one before him would be willing to take her place. "And this is the only way you won't."

"She'll hate me. Every time the cylons attacked she would come back and vent about how much she…" Gina broke out into a sob and clutched the table fiercely, unwilling to face reality.

"Helena," Gina called as she opened the hatch, her fingers trembling. "Helena, there's something I need to talk to you about."

She looked around the cabin for her lover and found her hunched over her desk filing through some paperwork. Her gun rested over on the table, out of reach from the admiral's hand. She would be unable to kill Gina straight away, at least.

"What?" Helena asked, barely looking up from the reports to look at the younger woman. "Can it wait?"

"No," Gina swallowed hard. "This… you're going to hate me."

"You're annoying and overly optimistic," Cain teased, setting down the papers. "And you undermine me whenever I'm off duty, but I don't think I could ever hate you."

Gina's throat felt dry as she swallowed again, figuring that moment was the best to say it. "Even if I was a cylon?"

Cain's face dropped and she picked the reports back up. "That isn't funny, Gina," she warned.

"Would you love me," Gina's breath was shaky as she walked towards the desk, hands moving to cover Helena's, "Even if I was a cylon?"

The admiral got up slowly, circling Gina with care. "Why would you even ask a question like that?"

"Because I…" Gina broke. Her body went limp and she fell back onto the desk, barely able to support herself with her arms. Cain pinned her to the desk with a look of betrayal in her eyes. "I love you," she managed to whisper. "No matter what."

"What are you saying?" Cain barked, her face becoming flushed. "Gina, you are not a frakking cylon."

Gina sobbed again and sunk to the floor, her eyes a puffy red mess. "I'm so sorry, Helena. So sorry." She repeated the words over and over; hoping one would fall upon Cain's deaf ears.

"Sergeant," Cain called loudly. "Arrest this thing."

"Sir?" The guard questioned while entering, having known about their relationship for a long time.

"Arrest that thing. Do you need your hearing checked, sergeant?" Cain threatened. "Because I would hate to think that you are questioning my orders."

"No, sir," the marine barked, kneeling down to pick up the fallen systems analyst. They exited the hatch and made their way down to the brig, Gina offering no resistance whatsoever. Two other guards followed them, and the third was about to leave until the admiral motioned for him to stay.

"Inform Commander Adama that we have just discovered that we as well have a cylon aboard our ship, and that Gaius Baltar must be held under suspect of treason." She turned swiftly back into her quarters, not waiting for him to respond.

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Okay, not my strongest work, but I mainly wanted to catch up to where the last one left off, so I kinda rushed it. PLEASE REVIEW! I'd love to know how I'm doing and if you guys just want me to stop.


	4. Liars and Traitors

Cain stared through the glass into the interrogation room at Dr. Gaius Baltar, who was fidgeting a great deal. Next to her were Roslin and her presidential aide, and the older Adama man. None of them had said a single word during the interrogation other than a formal greeting at the beginning. The admiral's teeth were hurting from clenching her jaw all day, and talking was only making it worse.

"Did you recognize Inviere as a cylon when you first encountered her?" the man asked.

Baltar hesitated a moment before answering, as if he were going to lie. "Yes," he said, "I recognized the woman posing as the systems analyst as a cylon after a moment or two."

"Then why didn't you turn her in or call to the marines stationed outside?"

"I was in shock," he confessed. "For some reason, it didn't initially make sense to me that there would be a cylon aboard _Pegasus._ By the time my brain finally wrapped around the concept, she had realized I knew about who she really was and was begging me not to tell anyone."

"Begging?" the interrogator asked. "So you are saying the cylon made no hostile actions towards you?"

Baltar nodded his head in confirmation. "None."

All four people behind the glass raised their eyebrows, and the man waited to see if any of them would have an objection. When no voice entered through his earpiece, he continued. "Can you please describe your conversation with the cylon then, Mr. Vice-President?"

"Yes, well, let's see…" Baltar stammered for a moment. "She was pleading with me not to tell anyone about her true identity. Gina, the cylon," he corrected himself. "She told me that she no longer had any interest in serving her superiors and wanted to stay within the human fleet. It was very touching, actually."

"You believed her?"

"Yes, obviously. She seemed to be genuine, so I believed her." Baltar shrugged as if his decision had been an easy one. "But I told her that if she didn't come forward about herself, I would be forced to take action. I asked the marine on the outside to keep a close eye on her when I left."

"Do you believe him?" Adama asked, deciding that there was nothing left in Baltar's testimony worth listening to.

Roslin shrugged as she shifted in her small, metal chair. "Everything he's said falls in line with what the marine and cylon said. Now, I don't necessarily believe the cylon, but I think Baltar really did believe her. What is your opinion about this, admiral?"

Cain felt her teeth grit tightly against each other again. Her eyes narrowed as she watched the doctor's face. "I agree." She spat out the syllables with disgust.

"Question is, do we try him for treason?" Roslin stretched as she stood, trying to keep her gaze from appearing too obvious.

"The press doesn't know anything besides the fact _Pegasus_ had a cylon aboard." Adama's low voice sent a shudder of anger up Cain's spine. At that moment, all she wanted was for them to keep their mouths shut. "I think charging your Vice President with treason will weaken you as well, Madame President. It might be best if we just keep an eye on him."

Roslin tsked the idea, but after a moment of internal deliberation, she voice her agreement, as long as they kept Baltar under strict surveillance. "First the baseships and now this," she growled under her breath. She looked over at Cain, whose body was slightly shaking. "Admiral, are you alright?"

"I'll be fine." Cain nodded her head in an attempt to convince herself of the words she was speaking.

"Are you sure?" Roslin asked. "You look awfully pale."

"I said I'll be fine," Cain barked, causing the admiral to take a step back.

Gina sat in her cell, hugging her knees to her body tightly. No one had come yet to torture, and she was unsure whether or not she should take that as a positive or negative thing.

Hearing footsteps, Gina looked up. Helena's cold face appeared before her; obviously she was not willing to forgive her. Gina chided herself for thinking that her former lover's reaction would be any different.

The admiral moved towards the phone, picking it and holding it against her face, though her stern expression remained the same. The cylon slunk over towards the other, lifting it lightly and pressing it close.

"Helena," she forced herself to say the woman's name. She was angry, of course, for how easy it was for Cain to forget about her love for her. Then again, perhaps she was just wearing that mask.

"Tell me it was all a lie," Cain growled into the receiver. "Tell me you never loved me."

"I can't," Gina responded weakly, touching the glass with the tips of her fingers, praying Helena would do the same. She saw the admiral's stiff hand tremble slightly, and she settled for that reaction. "I won't lie to you. Not anymore."

Cain's jaw twitched in anger, and Gina found herself grateful, for once, of the barrier between the two of them. "Bitch." She snapped the phone back into its cradle and stormed out of the brig, leaving the cylon alone to weep.

It had been a long day. The meetings with Roslin and Adama, of which she was determined to have no more of, and then visiting Gina's, the cylon's cell. It had been a mistake, she knew, but deep down, Helena knew she had needed to hear Gina say it. When she didn't, it only made matters worse.

Looking in the mirror, Helena determined the bags under her eyes had gotten worse, all in a twenty-four hour cycle. Pain travelled through her shoulders and neck.

"_You never talk about your family," Gina commented once they'd finished watching a romantic movie. "Why is that?"_

"_They died," Helena muttered as she pulled the young woman closer. "During the first cylon war."_

_Gina obliged happily and snuggled up closer against the brunette's chest. "Oh, I'm so sorry. I had no idea."_

"_Don't apologize." She was sick of this tiresome topic. She'd gone over it several times whenever the family issue was brought up, and after about the hundredth time, Cain decided everyone else was on a need to know basis. "It was a long time ago."_

_They stayed like that; Gina was wrapped tightly in Helena's arms, her head resting against the latter's shoulder. "What were they like?" she asked after a while._

"_Who?" The admiral was caught off guard by the question._

"_Your parents, silly," Gina pecked at Helena's cheek once she'd fully rotated herself to face her lover. She ran her fingers through the long, dark hair._

"_They were good people," Cain sighed, figuring Gina wasn't going to let the issue go until she shared a little. "My father worked as an accountant and my mother was a secretary for some Tauron based corporation. I forget the name."_

"_Did you have any siblings?" Gina asked as she played with a light curl in Helena's hair._

"_A sister, Lucy." Helena stated blankly, not wanting to bring up any memories about that day. "She was younger than me." She placed a soft kiss on Gina's nose and pulled back to look into her blue eyes. "You haven't told me anything about your family either, you know."_

"_Not much to tell," Gina puffed. "I'm an only child, raised by a single father. My mother walked out when I was four. I guess it was too much pressure being a priest's wife."_

_Helena stifled a laugh, imaging a young Gina in church waiting for her father to finish a sermon. "You're father was a priest?"_

"_Please don't laugh." Gina pouted. "Seriously, Helena. This is why I didn't tell you. I promise you I wasn't the cliché priest's daughter. I didn't wear pigtails or anything." Helena just gave her a cheeky grin and kissed her lightly._

Lies. Lies. Everything Gina had told her. All of those nights spent together. Lies. How could she have been foolish enough, ignorant enough to not notice that the woman she was frakking with was a frakking cylon?

Helena bit down on her lower lip to keep herself from crying. She couldn't show weakness, especially if it was due to that thing. Cain walked over to her desk, searching through the drawers for her precious knife. During her relationship with Gina, she'd tossed it aside. If everything Gina had told her was a lie, then everything Gina had taught her must surely be a lie as well.

Cain found the object and flipped it open. She placed the cold edge against her skin, willing herself to continue. A small opening appeared against her skin, but she withdrew before the cut could get any deeper. The feeling nauseated her. It no longer had the same affect over her. Whatever happened to the saying 'old habits die hard?' This was her oldest habit, so why had it died?

Helena sighed and walked over to the bathroom, pressing a towel against the open flesh. She stared at the mirror. The person looking back at her was not Helena, but Admiral Cain. She no longer had the luxury of coming home and shrinking her responsibilities for a few hours. She was Admiral Cain, and nothing less.


	5. The Beast

Would like to apologize about the scenes not being separated. I initially had some stars between them, but when I uploaded the story, it got rid of them. I'll make sure they don't disappear this time :) Keep in mind, if Thorne had never interrogated Gina then I don't think he would have gone to Sharon's cell and tried to torture her, which is why Agathon and Tyrol aren't in custody.

Cain hovered over her desk, going through Commander Adama's journals. There were several mentions about Lee Adama and Kara Thrace, both of whom were now under her command, along with Karl Agathon. She figured from day one that the younger Adama and Thrace were both too close to the commander, and after reading about Agathon's relationship with the cylon prisoner aboard _Galactica_, she had all three transferred into her line of command.

Karl Agathon. There were a multitude of reasons as to why he was no longer serving under Adama, though most had to do more with Cain wanting him near her. Besides her, he was the only person in the fleet who had an affair with a cylon. However, for reasons she didn't fully understand, the officer had not been charged with treason and was instead welcomed back, despite impregnating the enemy. Since the 'government' had not punished Agathon for his insubordination, Cain decided she would separate him from that thing he claimed to love.

"Admiral," a voice came from the other side of the hatch, knocking her out of her fuming. "I have the rest of the reports you asked for."

"Come in," Cain sighed, easing herself back into her chair. The door swung open, and Captain Shaw walked through with a thick pile of papers. "Is that all of it?" Cain asked. She eyed the stack from afar, figuring it would take hours to complete it all.

"Yes, sir," Shaw saluted, preparing to exit.

Cain returned the salute, and moved over to get another document. After reading the first line and not having felt the presence of the young captain disappear, she looked up. "Can I help you, Captain?" There was a note of hostility in her voice.

"I was just wondering," Shaw said evenly, "If there was anything else you needed before I return to the CIC." Cain noticed that the younger woman's line of sight was drawn slightly towards her bandaged wrist, and she turned it slightly so her hand was palm down.

"If I need something else, I will say so. That is all." Cain stated blankly. She watched Shaw exit the cabin and sighed loudly, irritated with the young woman's behavior as of late. Cain knew that Shaw was worried about her current state, but at least she was intelligent enough to not say so out loud.

Kara walked through _Pegasus'_ hollow corridors, anger fuming through her. Cain had no right whatsoever to transfer her away from _Galactica_, and despite Lee's constant begging, she wasn't keeping her anger a secret. Fisk had made a few backhand remarks about her attitude, and several of the officers appeared to be keeping her at arm's length. The only thing making her stay on The Beast slightly more bearable was the fact she had two of her comrades with her.

Agathon had been doing better with the change than she had expected. Although he didn't love being stuck in the belly of the beast, he didn't complain and just did his work while the rest of the crew stared at him as if he was a cylon. Lee was doing well too, all considering. Kara found some joy in the fact he wasn't treated like a prince by Cain, and he was deflated back to reality by her harsh treatment.

"Where are you going?" Kara spun around to face Louis Hoshi, that brat from CIC.

"Back to my quarters, I'm off duty," she scoffed impatiently. "That is allowed here, right?"

"Yeah," he muttered. "Wanna go get a drink?"

She raised an eyebrow, finding it difficult to turn down an opportunity to get drunk. "You're kidding me, for real?" Kara found it difficult to think that any of these stone faced demons would be capable of keeping up with her.

"Yeah." Louis gave her a slight smile. "I've got some ambrosia in my quarters, if you'd like."

"Sure," Kara answered cautiously. She followed him over to his quarters, ignoring the glances that were thrown at her by other _Pegasus_ officers.

Once they entered Hoshi's quarters, Louis made his way over towards the drawers on the far side of the room, pulling out two glasses and a tall bottle of honey colored liquid.

"So." Kara took the glass from him, "Has Cain always been this…tough?" she corrected herself before she said the word out loud.

"Sort of," Hoshi sighed, raising the glass to his mouth. "Before the whole Inviere incident she managed to resemble a form of humanity." He laughed under his breath and took another sip. "Somewhat."

"So you guys really didn't know she was a toaster, huh?" Kara leaned back and took sip of her ambrosia.

He shook his head laughed. "None of us did. She was so kind and always gave a hand wherever she could. When I heard she was a cylon, I was shocked."

Kara clicked her tongue at the strength of the drink. "So she was sleeping with the admiral?"

"Yeah. They moved in together after we found the civilian fleet in an attempt to make some more room." Hoshi topped her off. "Cain probably would have left them there if not for her, you know."

"Ouch," Kara sighed. "That sucks."

"It does," Louis gave her a sad smile. "It really does. Listen, I invited you here as an apology for everything that has happened. I can't imagine what it is like to be transferred away from your home."

Kara returned the smile. "Thanks. I'm sorry too, about your…err… friend."

"Thank you, Captain Thrace."

Agathon walked briskly to the brig, flashing an ID to the marines. He cringed when he saw the cylon prisoner curled up against the wall, her face emotionless and despondent. He walked over to the phone and knocked on the glass lightly, giving her a slight smile and a wave. She looked up, obviously confused about the man's presence, but nonetheless, she moved closer to the wall, lifting the phone to her face.

"Hello?" she asked.

"Hey," he said, unsure himself as to what he was doing there. "I... My name is Karl Agathon."

She cut him off abruptly, "What do you want?"

"I just wanted to see how you were doing." He shifted behind the glass awkwardly. "I...um... When I told Sharon I was being transferred to _Pegasus_ she asked me to see if you were okay."

"Sharon," she repeated the name slowly. "Number Eight? She's aboard _Galactica?"_

"We're having a baby." He said, causing her to lift a hand to cover her mouth. "She's been cooperating with Adama, and is being treated well because of it. I just want you to know that I'm going to do my best to make sure you're treated with the same humanities."

Gina laughed and shook her head. "Right."

"I'm serious." Karl felt badly for this poor woman, imprisoned by the woman she loved. "Is there anything I can do for you? Anything you need me to tell..."

"If she wants to hear what I have to say, she'll come here herself," Gina whispered into the receiver. "Thank you, Lieutenant Agathon, for coming. Please tell Sharon I said hello. I wish the two of you all the best." She put the phone back into the cradle and walked away, her back to Agathon.

He fisted his hands and clenched his jaw. Karl couldn't understand how Admiral Cain had been so cruel to this woman, acting as if she'd never loved her. Agathon turned and walked out of the room towards Cain's rooms, determination in his step.


	6. Exhaustion

Please don't hate me! I'm currently on student exchange, so my life's been really hectic and I almost forgot I had this story going on… Internet's been really shady for a while, but I think I'm good now and can continue writing. I promise that I'll be good now. If I ever stop for a really long time again leave an angry rant below and it'll make me get on.

I changed my mind on what I was going to do, so for those of you who remember the old chapter six, please forget it :) Thanks, and sorry again! (Oh, I just reread my older chapters and I have no idea what has been doing with my dividers… There used to be transitions between scenes and no I have NO clue where they went. Luckily this chapter doesn't have transitions, but in the future, I'll try really hard to make sure they stay)

The knocking on the hatch was painfully loud, especially when considering how late at night – perhaps early in the morning, now – it was. The admiral pulled on her jacket as she crawled out of bed, holding her shoulder in pain as she moved to get the door. Years ago, decades, in fact, when Cain had just been a young lieutenant, she'd torn a ligament in her left shoulder during a training exercise. It had been easy enough to fix, but the pain still returned occasionally. Only a few days ago Gina would have offered to…

Cain stopped herself. She wouldn't think about what had been like when things were easy, when she'd had someone to confide in. Revealing herself had been a mistake, one she was not going to repeat again. Gina had ended up being the very thing she had sworn to destroy, and the only other person who she'd ever spoken to in a semi-informal manner was Jurgen Belzen, and he had been transferred to _Galactica_ in exchange for those three coming without a fight. Even so, he had never truly been a friend or a confidant, not in the way she'd thought that thing had been.

Speaking of the devil, the admiral opened the hatch to see one of the newest officers aboard _Pegasus_ standing before her. He looked tired, but something had made him come to the admiral's quarters, and as much as she wanted to send him away, a nagging voice in her head told her to hear him out.

"Captain, what exactly do you think you're doing?" she asked the younger Adama, the tone in her voice indicating she was not amused, but not entirely angry either.

He gave her his best salute, considering the hour, which she returned as best she good. The throbbing in her shoulder was worse now, but Cain wondered how much of it might just be mental. "Admiral, I apologize for the time, but there's something I need to speak with you about."

"And it couldn't wait until morning?" She should be angry, but the admiral simply felt too exhausted to feel much of anything at the moment. Instead, she beckoned him inside, swinging the hatch behind him once he was all the way inside. "Captain," she spoke evenly and surprisingly clear considering how exhausted she felt. "What is it you wanted to talk about?

He shifted, though not much. It was obvious _Galactica_'s former CAG was trying to his best to be professional, but having been on duty for over twelve hours was making him a little fidgety.

"I wanted to talk to you about Kara Thrace, sir," he said.

Cain raised an eyebrow. "Lieutenant Thrace?"

"Yes, sir." Lee Adama looked uncomfortable, but the admiral was impressed, in part, by the courage it took for him to come speak to her directly about his comrade. The other part was tired and pissed off. "She's one of the best pilots in the fleet, but she's… difficult, at times, and only knows how to listen to certain people. If possible, I think it might be best for her to be transferred back to _Galactica_." He paused before adding a hasty, "sir."

Cain was suddenly awake enough to start being angry. "Captain, maybe you don't understand, but what you think is best doesn't matter. I am the commanding officer of this fleet, and if Thrace doesn't like it, then she will not be a part of it any longer. Perhaps it was acceptable to question your superiors aboard _Galactica_, but aboard_ Pegasus_ it will not be tolerated. Now, due to the hour, I am willing to pretend that you came here out of sheer exhaustion and are not thinking straight. However, if you ever question my judgment again, there will be consequences. Do you understand?"

Lee's jaw tightened slightly, and Cain found herself doing the same. However the feet had been run before her arrival was unacceptable. At least the boy had enough sense to understand when he'd lost the battle, though the admiral still felt the overwhelming desire to throw him in the brig. But it was late and to be honest, the paperwork kept her from doing so.

The captain's voice was thick when he spoke. "Yes, sir."

"Good, now if you don't mind- " Cain was cut off before she could say anything else. Outside of the hatch she could hear a loud conversation between an unfamiliar voice and her marines – the discussion not being what she'd classify as friendly. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw the young Adama's face tighten even more, meaning he knew the disturber. Being a male voice, that took out Thrace, leaving Agathon.

"By the gods," she muttered under her breath, despite being a nonbeliever. Furious at this point, she strode over to the hatch, swinging open with force. Every head turned as she barked, "What the frak do you want, Lieutenant?"

It was not the most graceful way of meeting her guest, but at this point, she didn't care. She almost regretted transferring the three to her ship – almost. Cain was still not going to allow the relationship between Adama and his son and Thrace, as well as that between Agathon and their cylon prisoner, continue any longer while she was in control of the fleet.

"Admiral." He saluted her, despite his obvious anger. "I need to discuss – "

"Like hell you do." She glared at him and Captain Adama. "It is twenty three o-hundred and the amount of sleep I've gotten in the last three days probably amounts to four hours. Unless you are about to tell me that the fleet is engaging in a cylon attack this fraking minute, get back to your bunks or to work. Agathon, you're due at the deck in ten minutes. Adama, you've been on duty for twelve hours, and at o-six, I expect you back in the CIC working at full capacity. If I see either of you in the next seven hours I will haul both of your asses down to the brig myself. Are we clear?" Before she could get a response from either, she turned to one of the marines. "Unless there is an emergency, I am going to get some sleep and do not wish to be disturbed."

She stepped aside so Lee could get through and slammed the door shut, leaving the five outside rather dumbstruck. Karl made a move for the door again, but Lee grabbed his shoulder and pulled him down the hallway.

"Don't."

"She can't treat her that way," Agathon growled.

Lee gritted his teeth, assuming he knew which 'she' Agathon was talking about. "Confronting her now isn't going to do you any good, and the admiral is right, you have flight duty in ten minutes."

"She's not just a machine." Karl clearly wasn't going to let it go that easily, but considering how much easier it was to pull him down the hallway, Lee figured that he at least was listening.

"I get it, but do you really think this'll do any good? Best-case scenario, you wind up in the brig, too. You're not going to do her any good if you're locked up, so just for now, go clear your head and leave the admiral alone."

Agathon's jaw clenched, but he turned away and headed towards the deck, leaving Lee alone in the hall. He ran a hand through his hair, wondering what exactly was going to happen next, but the thought left his mind quickly. He decided to take Cain's advice and walked to his quarters, collapsing into his bed and falling asleep nearly instantly.

Okay, there you go! I am back, I promise. I will finish this story. I know I suck for getting off… And I know 4 months is a really long time, but I'm really glad that some of you reviewed and asked me to continue. Please continue with the reviews!


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